I don't really want to be an engineer

People always seem perplexed by this statement. Well, if you don't really want to be an engineer, why do you spend so much time trying to be one? Because I'm interested in engineering. Well, if you are interested in engineering, why don't you want to be an engineer?

It's all about semantics really. Maybe it's because I'm a female that I'm less inclined to be defined by a role. Or maybe it's because I'm getting older. When I was younger I was a scientist. A genetic engineer. Science is historically a male dominated field. I went at that career path full guns. And this is how I came to understand that finding one's niche in the world involves so much more than simply wanting it to happen and working really hard and being competent. It involves politics and luck and destiny as well.

Or maybe I've been around enough studios now to know that audio engineering is a field that is many magnitudes more competitive than scientific research. Very few people find a way to make it a life-long endeavor. And even fewer women.

People interpret my attitude as a lack of ambition. But to me, life is about playing the hand you are dealt not the one you wish you had. So maybe, when I look at my hand, all I see is a pair of dueces. And as Kenny Rogers says, 'You've got to know when to hold 'em.'

Don't count me out just yet. I fully intend to bring my 'swingin' dick' to Steve Albini's poker game one of these years. But I'm not in a hurry.

Figure 1. My first studio

Figure 2. Guitar Room/Foyer

Figure 3. Mackie monitors and Ikea foldup chair

Figure 4. My blonde wurli with tubes

Figure 5. I know, I know. Where's the tape machine?



First Studio Closes.

So for those of you who haven't gotten the memo, my first studio is no more. The building had some poison gas issues which it looks like I will be recovering from for some time. So, it was clearly for the best. Still, it was my first studio, and I had spent a LOT of time fixing it up just right. I turned the foyer (front entrance) into a guitar room and it had a cool vibe going. But as most engineers could tell you (not that I am one), studio closings are a rite of passage. And I suppose if you want to get technical, this wouldn't be my first studio closing as I've interned at studios that have closed. But this is the first one that I had a vested interest in, I suppose. Anyway, since many of you never got to see it, I did a little photo tribute.


Ivory Lodge reopens.

Well, as karma would have it, bad luck is sometimes good luck in disguise as I quickly found a new improved home for all my gear. They didn't seem to mind making room for my wurli at Third Ear. Not only are the neighbors much more tolerant to the noise, but there is more room, more experience, more microphones, and now that you mention it a single girl living by herself with a studio was fundamentally a bad idea anyway. Best of all, my fellow Creotians will be happy to know that Third Ear is a fully integrated studio with the best of both analog and digital technology. Plus, I've already gotten to meet some eccentric rock star types. I don't know if i could have imagined a better outcome.


Creot Radio.

Is amazingly still thriving and getting ready to celebrate it's 2 year anniversary. Who knew a bunch of slackers would have such longevity? If you would like to hear some of the shows I hosted, please click here.



As I mentioned elsewhere, I haven't been very prolific as of late due to health issues that I'm focusing on, but I have a number of projects that are cooking on slow burn. If you would like to hear some audio samples of things I am working on, please check out my music page.